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Why do we expect perfection?

Sorry not sorry, but this is going to be an odd combination of thoughts that have kept me pre-occupied while driving the last couple weeks. The drama that people have created around Olympic opening ceremonies, the turmoil around the disaster of a political season this is, the continued post-pandemic chaos where people are still ridiculed for wearing masks in public… why are we constantly trying to be at odds with one another?

Are these issues well-founded… or is everyone just looking for a reason to be upset with each other? For crying out loud, the Olympic ceremonies haven’t been “normal” in decades. An artistic expression that some may find interesting, some may find beautiful, and some won’t understand – wander into any art gallery these days, and that’s exactly what you’ll find. Does it detract from the goal of celebrating these athletes and what they have worked so hard for? Certainly. However, none of us volunteered to serve on the Paris 2024 Planning Committee – so it really isn’t our place to make this kind of judgment… especially when our children are at risk of losing funding for the programs at school that could help them achieve similar extracurricular goals if they so chose to pursue them. Why don’t you direct your focus there instead?

The subject line implies my thought process over the last few days… why would anyone run for political office at this critical point of our society? Some journalist is going to pull up a story from college about how the candidate did a keg stand freshman year of college, and someone will read their spin on the story and decide something about it was offensive. Instead of focusing on the issues at hand and getting their message out to potentially undecided voters, the campaign has to focus the majority of their time on damage control with something that hasn’t impacted anyone’s lives (and won’t impact anyone) – ever.

We seem to have our minds made up that it is the responsibility of athletes, celebrities, political figures, and the like… to achieve perfection in whatever it is they do. Newsflash – we are human. It is in our nature to make mistakes (just ask Adam and Eve), and it is part of our DNA no matter how much you try to ignore that. We wonder why the pool of options of who to vote for is so abysmal, but we also TERRORIZE whoever steps up and volunteers. Look at how badly past Presidents and high-ranking officials have aged in the past 20 years – we as a society put them through hell and still expect smiling faces, perfect pronunciation, and immaculate decision-making whenever they are in public. It simply can’t happen, but we lean into major media outlets to tell us how we should feel about those mistakes and weird looks, and it creates more of a hellscape in social media AND our actual, very real daily lives when it doesn’t have to.

Children used to dream of becoming professional athletes, and often still do – but now have to decide if paparazzi following their every move is worth the contract they are in pursuit of. We see these insane numbers in the NBA / NFL / MLB, only to then calculate they get about 50% of the number after taxes and fees, have to pay an absurd amount for security to keep themselves and their families safe from the scrutiny (and to those of you sending death threats to people’s homes after they miss a field goal… please get yourself some help)… it makes no sense. Why would anyone volunteer to be the face of any major organization when the backlash has become this fierce? Self-harm and the taking of own lives continues to be a major issue in our society, but we get mocked by others when we try to suggest that pursuing mental health should be a priority for everyone (and that those resources need to be more readily available) – especially for those in precarious positions.

If you got this far in my rambling, I appreciate you. I know you tend to scroll past when I suggest that you vote anything other than Republican or Democrat… but if you continue to believe that one side is better than the other, we are going to be doing this same song and dance in four years – unless a civil war breaks out before then. There are SO MANY OTHER THINGS that deserve our time and attention: the fact that several people can’t get jobs right now because corporations have made the process inaccessible, the fact that there are neighbors of yours who will have to choose tonight between paying a past due bill or feeding their family, the fact that technological advances are crippling our ability to remain decent human beings with purpose… I can go on and on. Come grab a drink and smoke with me sometime on the porch and talk about it if you’d like – but please, stop wasting time spewing nonsense on platforms (keep in mind, this is also a reminder to myself) when we have so many other good things to be doing with our time and talents.

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This is 36.

I emotionally collapse when my daughter asks “do you HAVE to go to work today”? 

When I plug into my work, it brings me incredible amounts of joy – to see the fruits of labor immediately, unlike other industries or career paths. The ideal guest experience is the ultimate pursuit, and getting to craft concepts to that end since the pandemic has truly been a blessing.

I have never felt more politically homeless in my life. Every suggested option for local, state, or federal is brought to us from the depths of Hell.

I often get frustrated with myself for not going to the gym more often, and even more frustrated looking at the time spent during the week searching for times when I could have gone.

I’m reaching the point where alcohol doesn’t do my aching mind or body any favors – but there are other things out there that do, and I’m incredibly grateful for them.

There are days I still refresh the bank app hoping to see an unexpected large sum be deposited into the bank account – yet I have no idea where it would be coming from, because winning the lottery requires playing it more often.

I am very optimistic about the future of the Church, both here and abroad, largely due to the levels of vocations AND laity commitments to bettering our situations no matter what the circumstances may be.

I stood up the “wrong way” this morning and now my back will ache the rest of the day. Getting adjusted at the chiropractor is now considered the ultimate self-care.

I know I’m old when… I have no shirts to wear, because I hate taking the time to iron them – but remain pissed off at my favorite dry cleaners for nearly doubling their prices.

I also know I’m old when all the mainstream music being made today absolutely sucks, yet every playlist pre-2010 has nothing but bangers.

Playing music continues to be the ultimate outlet for stress, pain, joy, you name it – I’m so glad I have kept up with it, even if I don’t get to practice as often, and “practice” these days looks like accompanying Elizabeth as she sings lullabies to everyone.

Regardless of how gloomy our political and societal outlook is, I somehow continue to remain hopeful that with each smile and conversation… I can try to make the day a little bit better for each person I interact with. If we all aimed to do that with our actions and responses this week, I’m pretty confident the impact would be overwhelmingly noticeable.

My thoughts go all over the place, all day every day. Not sure I would have it any other way. This is 36.

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Yes Donald, I can make bold statements too.

As that terrible season of life circles back around (unfortunately) – several of you have encouraged me over the years to run for political office… while that will likely never happen, I do acknowledge the importance of everyone being aware of one’s stances on the important things in life – so without further adieu, here is what you need to know about some of my beliefs – political, satirical, or otherwise.

I believe that in order for us to have better qualified candidates for major offices, we must create standards around comprehension / faculties that limit those who should be enjoying retirement and time with their loved ones from making a mockery of what we grew up believing is a dignified title to hold. I understand that there are a TON of these people holding office and that getting majority on a ruling to make such a change will take more time than I’d like ,but it will at least be a start. The lobbying friends on either side are currently dictating how we must live our lives, and increasing politician net worth as a result. Yet several influential leaders are still asking for pay raises – when I’ve talked to more people than I’d like to admit in the last three weeks that are starting to worry about prioritizing which bills to pay first… which is eerily similar to what us millennials saw happen in 2008.

I believe that Michael Jordan is the greatest basketball player of all time – in the manner of which the sport was meant to be played. LeBron James is a freak athlete similar (and superior) to those we watched play multiple professional sports at the same time in the 90’s – and his endurance over the years is to be commended – but the game of basketball he competes in is more of a 3 Point Contest at the All-Star Game than an actual season of wear and tear on the body. Kobe is actually my #2, for what it’s worth.

I believe that the Department of Transportation in each state should immediately fire any personnel who schedules road work to be done during rush hour on any road, ever. I also believe that citizens should be empowered to put points on their fellow man’s drivers license when they witness them being complete idiots and ignoring all common sense on the roads we have to take every single day.

I believe that big pharmaceutical companies are actively trying to ruin our lives to fatten their wallets, not improve them like their euphoric commercials on television tend to suggest. I also believe that people are doing more harm than good by choosing to ignore the simple fact that all things cannabis, which are natural and given to us by God, work better in nearly every scenario that big pharma tries to maintain a monopoly over.

I believe that gambling is a terrible addiction that is quickly impacting more people in a very negative manner. The fact that every major media outlet now has their own platforms for doing just this makes it as easy a click of a button… and those that are already in major financial holes are digging themselves deeper for the sake of winning a parlay. There is no doubt that it is now impacting the results of games that most of us cherish watching for the natural outcome – something we would stone others for doing a couple decades ago, but now seems entirely commonplace.

I believe that we are in real danger culturally of abandoning creativity for the sake of nostalgia. While my endorphin levels skyrocket as high as any other millennial when I hear certain tracks be reused or plotlines be reinvented for the sake of getting us to the box office, these works also tend to dilute the quality of art that surrounds us. The arts must continue to be embraced at every level in society, and I know I’m not the only one who feels that way – let our wallets do the talking, support local, and be a primary source of support for those in your network pursuing such activity either full-time or on the side.

I believe that South Park – yes, that animated TV show your parents hated hearing the language of – is one of the most brilliant pieces of television that future generations will continue to reference long after we’re gone. What they have done to put every corner of society in check over the years is nothing short of remarkable, and I am forever grateful to the network overlords for never pulling the plug on something that will continue to provide all the reasoning people need when trying to process various overreactions to life issues.

I believe – and people are starting to realize this more often, which is great – that how we choose to educate our children is completely in our hands, no matter what others try to convince you of. This is something no one in society can shove down our throats, and it must be celebrated – rather than some current situations where children are being taught (by their parents’ examples) to mock those who may come from a chartered school, were homeschooled, had a different format because of abilities, you name it. We have such a special gift in this country to mold our children in the manner in which we deem to be the best way for them to pursue a vocation / career as well as acclimate to society… and I hope we never let anyone get in the way of continuing that.

That’s all I got for now – what are some interesting beliefs that would have your friends and family raising an eyebrow at you?

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The people have spoken, but no one listens.

Citizens of the United States have a variety of thoughts and feelings regarding the midterm elections that just took place, but an exit poll question was shared on several news networks last week that no one seems to want to keep talking about.

Over SEVENTY PERCENT of voters said that their preference is to have NEITHER Biden or Trump as candidates in the 2024 election. That percentage implies a substantial development from both major groups – of course parties can be dissatisfied with certain candidates, but this matchup in 2020 was one of the most polarizing of our time. We have a very clear majority that want to move on from this madness, and yet the media (along with those in charge) continue to shove this narrative down our throats. These men are too old, too controversial, and (I’m a broken record here) should be at home with families instead of injecting more chaos into our government.

I actively studied politics in high school, and seriously considered majoring in Poly Sci when I was deciding where to go for college. While I would never dream of subjecting my family and friends to the extreme impact of running a campaign for a higher office in this day and age, I continue to be fascinated by the lack of educating oneself that remains the usual voter’s approach to preparing for each election cycle. Endless attacks on one’s personal character/political history because of a random Tweet or commercial you saw one day does not entitle you to a superior opinion, but rather puts you in the majority of those who do less than the bare minimum to learn about candidates before formally casting a ballot.

Let’s visit the notion of the “wave” that normally favors the party not holding the Oval Office very four years. For decades, the Republicans and Democrats have assumed that by attacking the other’s President early on in their term – it is only natural that the nation will follow their lead and empower them in the other government branches to seek a true balance of power. However, 2022 is showing a buck in that trend because of two primary factors: first, the candidates selected from both sides were not exactly what the public wanted to replace incumbents (cue celebrity TV doctors, and others who seem to think democracy is something to be taken from someone else) – and secondly, the MOST influential factor, is that the nation does NOT like the idea of a candidate needing to be “backed” by Trump as a means for getting elected into office over someone else.

We can go back and forth on this all day, as most of you know that I voted third-party in 2020 since my conscience would not allow me to cast a vote for either of these senile men to hold one of the most important positions in the world (and furthermore, I did the same thing in 2022 when it came to replacing our soon-to-be-vacant Senator spot in NC based on the options we were presented with). You can do your best to tell me my vote is “wasted” in this system, but the independents taking office (or forcing run-offs due to percentages not being reached) are implying quite the opposite. If more of you were willing to act on how you feel, the candidates being vetted and polled would be of higher quality and a better reflection of the platform you claim to represent… or you may finally see the light and put some effort into creating a healthier alternative.

Our nation may indeed be approaching its 250th birthday, but when it comes to the discussions had on nearly every platform – you would think that the US is struggling with puberty in its teenage years with acne popping up every other day no matter what kind of facial scrub we use. I hope that the surprising outcomes (I’m defining “surprising” by noting how many races went against polling data) challenge everyone to not merely call the election process into question – the fact that it takes us weeks to count votes amid lawsuits from both sides is just downright depressing – but to take time from scrolling through Reels and TikToks to dig more into what makes someone an ideal candidate to you personally. You might be surprised as to what you find, and I’ll be over here with a cigar to talk about it all when you do.

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The World of Podcasts

Since several of you are constantly asking when you get in my car “what the heck is this” I’m listening to… let’s dive in.

I LOVE podcasts. Whether the commute is short or long, you get the opportunity to listen in to someone else’s take or conversation on a topic you may know nothing about – or on the contrary, get to hear a differing opinion than your own and have the necessary alone time to process and reflect on it.

For those looking for recommendations, I will break them down into a few categories and provide links below. As our world continues to transition to more digital content, I highly encourage you to consider this option in lieu of certain video platforms – or even to make the most of your walk/run instead of music to shake things up.

Faith-Based: This is easily the area I spend most of my listening, as it is of paramount importance to me that I stay in tune with the vulnerable and honest voices that dive deep into issues that concern us all.

1 – Catching Foxes. There can’t be enough said about Luke and Gomer, as their witty banter is the sort that everyone (religious or not) can listen in to and appreciate immensely. The brutal honesty, which often comes with emotional meltdowns as life throws crap at us on the daily, is a refreshing change of pace to listen to in the madness of this world. I often find myself laughing at the start of an episode, and sobbing 20 minutes later… and laughing again by the end, because these guys take you on an incredible roller coaster.

2 – The Gloria Purvis Podcast. This incredible woman has been put through a myriad of challenges as this side of media has played catch up with the rest of the world, and continues to hold her head high and tackle the toughest of topics that most would rather leave alone. The subject matter is often intense (in comparison to what others are willing to converse about), and it is so desperately needed in today’s society – because she does it from a place of pure love for all, no matter what.

3 – Saint Dymphna’s Playbook. As one who believes mental health continues to be widely ignored in our society (or rather, our society makes false claims about addressing the issue), Tommy Tighe has graciously taken the time to develop a fantastic set of episodes on the subject. Not only will he dive deep into topics that others are afraid to speak up on, but he does it in a manner that is prayerful – and I often find myself incorporating these quick bits into my daily prayer life as a way to keep the intention of mental health at the forefront of my prayers.

Humor: Because there are times when I simply need to take a break from the seriousness and let loose.

1 – Correct Opinions w/ Trey Kennedy. There is no denying that this personality has captured the hearts of many who spend too much time on social media, and he takes it a step further by exploring hysterical categories like crazy white baby names (that drive us ALL insane).

2 – AJ Presents The GR8R Good. An old college friend continues to stir the pot with Abbey alumni and on demand listeners alike by stating the pure and simple truths that we may or may not want to hear. Though I may not always agree with his statements, he did do the Lord’s work in convincing me to watch HIMYM and understand just how glorious of a television series it really was.

3 – Riled Up w/ Arielle + Matt. This darling couple takes time out of their insanely busy celebrity lifestyle (sarcasm, sort of) to tell us what really gets them fired up, and I am constantly here for it. Often poking fun at each other and their hysterical relationship, it is a breath of fresh air for many who need to simply let off some steam when it comes to an odd argument or situation encountered during the day – because these two have the willingness to go down that rabbit hole with you of verbally taking a bat to that person’s car.

Motivational / Miscellaneous: Because my interests are all over the place, and it can be hard for you to keep up.

1 – New Mindset, Who Dis?. Case Kenny was someone I stumbled across when I needed this form of inspiration the most – quick bits to get your day/week started with the right frame of mind, no matter what part of life may be bothering you at that moment. Once you get hooked on this guy, you’ll find yourself buying his journals and rocking out to his Motivational Mixtapes – and becoming a 1000% better person as a result.

2 – The Catholic Guy Show. For those who can’t listen to Lino real-time on Sirius XM, this is the next best thing. This option ends up in this category – because if you take the time to listen, you’ll realize that this crazy collection of misfits (even with the show name) doesn’t belong in any assigned category. Though Lino and Mark will often berate Tyler over his refusal to give in and convert already, the faith aspect of the topics they cover can often blend into the background as they celebrate being human… and often, the errors/mishaps that come with that blessing as a result.

3 – Everyday Liminality. I know, it is a couple of guys who wear “weird robes” and all… but no, this one still doesn’t go into the Faith-Based category either. These Franciscan brothers do an incredible job diving into the world of entertainment and really doing justice to the work that creators/writers put in to making these shows and movies what they really are. The titles can often really snag your interest too – “Field of Dreams: The Notebook For Guys” speaks to me on quite a personal level, and I feel obligated to share another favorite with you all.

Honorable Mentions: (may or may not be ones that I have appeared on in the past)

1 – Cut. Light. Connect. (yes, this is our own vlog which is different… but alas, I’m biased)

2 – NC F&B Podcast

3 – Music and Booze with Mo

If you enjoy what you find in the black hole of podcasting, please consider subscribing and supporting these cool cats and kittens in any way you can. I find myself often subscribing to Patreons and finding their live shows in hopes of connecting with fellow listeners and creating a more positive environment around us all. Who knows… if you play your cards right, you may end up convincing me to start up my own.

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United States? What’s united about it?

In any given city at this current time in our lives, you will find people ready to fight – verbally and/or physically – over their beliefs that they are right when it comes to a smorgasbord of items. Religion, science, and what you may believe to be the truth about any given category is up for grabs – people share screenshots of what they find online and profess it to be their sole reason for taking up the fight against vaccines, masks, refugees, and overall human decency. There are legitimate talks in certain parts of the country of having towns on state lines “identifying” with the next state over – because they can’t stand the tax rates and policies in the state they are currently affiliated with. If we didn’t have a bunch of keyboard warriors as citizens in 2021, there could be a legit civil war that breaks out in the US (and there is no denying that everyone is going to avoid battle with Texas – the amount of ammo stored in that state is enough to overtake the rest of the country).

Let us get one thing straight – you are no better than the person next to you just because the beliefs you express may give you the courage to think that. Your simple Google search for stats does not give you the ability to “take down” someone who has studied that subject their entire lives on an online platform. Your failure to pay attention in class or church does not give you the right to claim expert status just because “I was raised in that church” or “I took that class freshman year” – get over yourselves and your false claims to credibility.

Right now, everyone in this world is struggling with something (whether they openly admit it or not). For me, I’m struggling to maintain sanity when I am bombarded day in and day out with people’s opinions that are hurtful, illogical, and just plain foolish to be sharing in public. It reaches the point where depression and anxiety look at each other and wonder how much more creative they could get than the circumstances we find ourselves in.

If you think this post might be in reply to something you said or did… it probably is. Now, more than ever, is the need for careful self-examination when it comes to how we process the information we receive – and especially when it comes to how we turn around and share said information. This is not merely about religious or scientific debates, but across all subject matters that the media zooms in on with the hope of getting us frustrated with each other.

If you think this is Ben trying to sit on a high horse, please seek help. I am simply sick and tired of people posting stories for the purpose of getting others riled up because “THIS SITE SAID MASKS ARE USELESS” and “NOBODY IS GONNA MAKE ME CARRY A FORM OF ID TO GET SOMEWHERE” – take a Xanax and understand that all of us are trying to figure this out together. Not a single soul wanted anything about the pandemic to last more than a few weeks, yet here we are nearly back to square one across the GLOBE. You are all amazing people – don’t let temporary flareups get in the way of that shine.

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There is no easy way to say this…

We are all idiots. All of us.

Falling repeatedly into the media traps with misleading headlines, click bait articles, things that sound promising but never turn out to be what we expected…

It does not have to be this way.

Sure, social media and the interwebs are our lifeblood at this point – it is the easiest way to communicate with family and friends, to announce new additions to the family or post pictures of various celebrations.

It is also the easiest way to put a target on your back by making a simple comment that seems harmless (or rather quite intentional) at the time. You become a villain to others just because of having an opinion that APPEARS to contrast with theirs, and it draws lines in the sand where they should never exist (seriously, when did our wellbeing start to depend on people unfriending/unfollowing us?).

For example: you use the phrase “all lives matter” because you genuinely believe those words in the context that you take them to be in. However, to someone reading them who has seen persecution in a way that you could never relate, they cannot fathom that to be true when their life experience has shown that to be the opposite. Saying that you have amazing friends, even best friends, who happen to be a different skin color (as I am certainly guilty of in the past) is not your get-out-of-the-argument-free card when it comes to this discussion.  

Another example: you claim to be “pro-life” in the sense that you believe life should be sacred and valued from conception to natural death. However, to someone who has seen horrendous tragedy in their lives and may not have been raised in the same moral code as you – it is outrageous to them that you would tout yourself as “more righteous” than them just because making those major decisions in life has come a lot more naturally for you. Moreover, if you use that phrase and follow it up with a statement that attacks those trying to immigrate to a new country or those trying to fight their way out of extreme poverty… you, by not showing the mercy and forgiveness bestowed on you by the Creator, are a hypocrite.

One more example: you claim to be “anti-marijuana” while trying to vote for farmer’s rights and supporting tobacco lobbyists in each state, when little did you know that it is becoming the one crop that can save their small businesses in the states where it has been legalized. While actively stating your opinion on this “drug” that has now been proven to tackle some of the most complicated health issues our existence has seen, you try to seek sympathy from others when someone close to you loses their addition battle to a pharmaceutical that could very well have been avoided. There is a better way through the madness, and it starts by admitting (and feeling) fault one way or another.

Without empathy and compassion on both sides of each topic in a conversation, the opportunity for progress between each other is non-existent… and for some of you/us, it might require admitting that the lack of compassion has really been a one-way street for quite some time. Resorting to terms that the media shoves down our throats rather than using our OWN words to describe our OWN feelings gets us nowhere.

Be better. I promise I am trying to do the same.

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Stop the nonsense.

You, the one shaming your friends for sharing information they came across online in one form or another. You, the one “threatening” to unfriend people you at least somewhat care about because something they posted may have inaccurate data to go along with it. EVERYONE IS FRUSTRATED. EVERYONE WANTS ANSWERS.

What is this righteous horse you sit on? Instead of making fun of others or calling them terms that accomplish nothing, why don’t you take the time to educate them with what you know? Not a single one of you has the solution, but is quick to the draw with a meme or snarky comment as someone is trying to get to the bottom of why we are in this mess. People are collapsing mentally all over the world, and all we can do is fight over when and how is “appropriate” to give everyone a source of income once again after volunteering their livelihoods as a means for limiting the spread of COVID-19.

It doesn’t matter if what they share sounds ludicrous – there are far more bizarre truths in this world that people are afraid to admit (perfect example: how the two party system is antiquated for our needs). It also shouldn’t matter to you if they didn’t take the time to thoroughly vet the credentials of the people in the interview they watched and shared, because you can’t pretend for two seconds that you do the same with everything you put on your personal profile. For crying out loud, this is simply some of society’s plea to have the right kind of conversation looking for the light at the end of the tunnel (and to hold those accountable for wrongdoing in the event there was any).

If one of your friends or family chooses to share content that you find misleading or inaccurate, do the responsible thing and educate/inform with valuable information that may let the conversation dive deeper. Belittling our neighbors is the MOST irresponsible thing we can be doing at this moment in time (and trust me, I remind myself all the time not to join in). Show respect and love in each interaction, and maybe – just maybe – we will have a chance at keeping hope for humanity alive in this mess.

End rant.

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We make it so much harder than it needs…

To make the world a better place, the recipe has always been relatively simple – love, whether or not you receive it in return. Whether you’re religious or not, spiritual or not, most can agree in some form of “karma will always come back around”, the golden rule, etc. as a quality way to choose how to act on a regular basis.

People can be awful at times. They will, consciously or not, decide to lie / cheat / steal from those they claim to love, often with no regard to potential consequences as they pursue the immediate gratification that comes with their choice. There can be justification for rash responses, but often that idea of retaliation / revenge comes from the same part of the soul that your counterpart is still battling with themselves. Choosing to be the bigger person in that moment can feel like an insurmountable mountain to climb, but the long term mental health benefit is much too great to ignore. 


When someone posts something online that you inherently disagree with, it shouldn’t motivate you to assault them with a barrage of unfair insults and degrading comments. Often, their willingness to post publicly about it comes from a place where they are looking for a constructive dialogue on how to face an issue together, not on how to divide us more. Our national media outlets do a great job of that already – anyone who even mentions CNN or Fox News immediately gets labeled “one side” or “the other side” in most minds, because of the stereotypes these outlets are willingly embracing for the sake of causing a scene (AKA creating more content).

As things continue to unfold the next couple weeks with this strand of coronavirus, I humbly plead with everyone to remember that there are so many unique ways to show love of neighbor. One day, it might be helping a coworker who can’t afford the babysitting cost to be able to come into work that day. Another day, it might be having a geniune conversation with a homeless person, who isn’t actually looking for a handout but is looking for the right resources to get on the right path… but isn’t aware of what is around because they are new to town. 


Even still, some of our more vulnerable neighbors whose immune systems aren’t capable of handling going out and grocery shopping… it takes such a small amount of effort to grab an extra bag or two at the store for them, and yet in their lives you are making a difference of incomparable value. Instead of the online badgering and commenting that gets us nowhere, constantly be looking for the potential to be of true value in the conversation and activity at hand.


“In the midst of chaos, there is also opportunity.” – Sun Tzu

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Why so hostile?

I get it – there are political views that we all get fired up about, and there is no fault in being passionate about something you firmly believe in. That being said… when you listen to a politician speak, I ask that you do something to help the world around us in a small way. Remember that this person is stepping up to the podium out of a desire to help our country (at least, the majority of the time) become better than we currently are, and are subjecting their families and loved ones – not just themselves – to the constant scrutiny of the media and any of us who find fault in something they do or say.


Take a moment and examine how you would feel if your child came home from school in absolute tears, having been bullied because someone made a meme of you from the debate the night before and it managed to go viral overnight. How would you react if you found your spouse melted into the couch sobbing after someone defaced their vehicle while they were at the grocery store shopping for your family? The things that are encouraged by so many of our neighbors as gut reactions to the political climate continue to do much more harm than good, and we need to be vocal about the need to address it.


We love to jump behind the walls of our computer screens that we think exist, but the way we react to the actions and statements of politicans tell society just as much about ourselves as it does the ones starting the conversation. Instead of rushing to use hurtful words that we may not necessary mean (i.e. someome is racist, something-phobic, etc.), take the time to listen with your individual compassion with just as much effort as your intellect. More than likely, the person running for office has a stance on that issue because of something personal that happened to them – and if that isn’t the case, I hope they are honest with themselves and with the general population in how they logically came to their conclusion. 


This request of mine comes from the mindset of mine that the two party system in our country is doing much more to separate us rather than unite us. We are better than this current state of affairs, and we can show that – one charitable response at a time. Taking the time to fully listen and process before responding has gone out the window in dialogue today, but that doesn’t mean it can’t make a comeback. Empathy is a beautiful thing – it doesn’t mean that we are going to convert everyone to our opinion, but it will help foster an environment where people feel more comfortable both opening up about how they truly feel and making positive suggestions as to how we can improve our world together.