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The trials of being a decent person.

Friends, it’s been a while. I felt compelled to write to you today after seeing various reactions to the jury verdict that was reached this week. I put these words down out of love, out of hope for our future, and what we are capable of accomplishing together.

First and foremost, we are human beings. It is in our nature to make mistakes, and it is also in our nature to learn from them. What we have been witnessing over the past year are groups of our fellow brothers and sisters struggling and reaching out for help. Whether you or I have been actively involved in incidents that have led us to this point is somewhat irrelevant – I merely hope that we all recognize the opportunity at hand to play our part in making our communities safer for everyone who resides in them.

This week, a group of our peers met together and determined that what one man did to another was wrong and that justice needed to be rendered in the form of punishment. I know everyone wants to play conspiracy theorist and find ways to clickbait others into believing some particular aspect of this incident to draw more lines in the sand, but enough is enough. We owe it to ourselves as human beings first and foremost to look out for each other – and in this circumstance, it requires a look in the mirror to examine how we can conduct ourselves so that we don’t give the news outlets any more reasons to throw these types of once-in-a-lifetime circumstances in our faces once more.

Love your neighbor. Jesus made it so simple, yet we find it to be the most troubling part of our time on Earth. It DOES NOT MATTER if this neighbor has a drug problem, has a mental health problem, bullied you in the past, whatever it might have been – love. your. neighbor. We have been conditioned to believe that this is a “gray” area based off what others tell us, but it doesn’t change the fact that we need to put preconceived notions aside when it comes to treating our fellow humans with dignity and respect.

This is not a conservative, moderate, or liberal position. As a simple man, I implor you to walk the walk when it comes to taking up a cross and remembering that only those without sin cast the first stone. Let us encourage each other to look straight through to the heart of someone we interact with – no matter skin tone, how they vote, and what pains may have been caused in the past.

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Your moral compass.

This is a concept that has been around that deserves a revisit during this trying time in our society. Definition: noun

  1. used in reference to a person’s ability to judge what is right and wrong and act accordingly.

Ignore any of the misleading conservative / liberal connotations, whether something makes you red or blue, right or left, traditional or progressive. All of us are human – and that is a concept everyone should be taking to heart in the frustration that has been the year of 2020. The very idea of being human (and all the blessings/trials that come with it) should be the centering force in our moral compass as we walk through each day.

If I get worked up over a vehicle that has cut me off (as I do nearly every day in Charlotte), I’m not upset because this person is “fitting a stereotype” for their level of melanin, I’m upset because in my view – the person is not exercising decency on the road. My moral compass first swings in the direction that their action is inexcusable, that they are potentially causing others to react hastily and cause a scary scenario on the local highway.

Then, I remind myself that there are times when such actions may be justifiable to me personally – that person’s spouse could be going into labor with their child, a family member may be in need of aid, or the various areas of construction in town are causing them to run late for a close friend’s wedding. Should this person truly be in violation of the rules and simply endangering others, it will only be a matter of time before the proper authority over that scenario is able to assist in reminding them of the commitment we have to others on the road. I tell myself that life goes on outside of my own little bubble, and I get back to singing along to whatever song I have playing in my own car.

These small interactions that can get hyped up should be the least of our worries, and our magnetic base in our moral compass is there to remind us of exactly that. While we don’t always take the compass out of our pocket to examine the specific way to lead our troops, we all are aware that there is a certain level of decency that we expect humans to show one another – no matter what the situation may be. It is an inherently human characteristic to be compassionate to others who may be facing a situation we either A) know exactly the type of pain/stress that accompanies it, or B) have no idea and can only speculate how terrible of a time they must be going through.

In the latter, it appears that many in our society have fallen prey to the claws of media (mainstream/social) and to some extent ignorance (distraction by other means) so that the compassion falls by the way side in what we think is a legitimate excuse. If someone is trying to peacefully protest, your compass should tell you to take the time to LISTEN to them. You may not agree that their reasons are valid, but your show of decency at least demonstrates to them that their voices can be heard and that they are indeed entitled to that level of freedom in this country. You will be surprised at how they are just as upset as you are with the rioting and looting that has occurred in an attempt to undermine their cause.

As I’ve stated before to those who have asked – I am clearly in no position to weigh in on many of the issues that are prevalent today. The closest thing I have encountered to racism on my behalf is being granted an interview for my position because of my last name – Torres – where a hiring manager was trying to prioritize a minority hire, and was clearly disappointed to see my genetic blend of primarily Italian/German walk through the door (the story of how our family got the last name to be told at a later time). When it comes to the issues of interactions with police and other societal pressures that have been put on people of color throughout the centuries, I can’t speak from experience – and I most definitely cannot justify my own speculation as an excuse to not take it more seriously.

Now is the time to listen – or at the very least, make yourself available to listen to those around you if they aren’t ready to open up yet. I don’t know if you’ve turned on a phone or television in the last month or two… but there is finally a conversation producing results in this area rather than it being one-sided with our brothers and sisters in Christ feeling unheard. If you don’t know where to start (it’s okay, I didn’t really have much of an idea either) but resources are being shared across the globe for us – and you can ALWAYS devote your time and effort to where it will always make an impact, such as the food banks and other non-profits that rely on volunteers to make any sort of impact in our communities.

Wake up tomorrow determined to make a difference. I’ll see you there.